i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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