yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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