It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I just forgot I was standing up.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
