This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize