It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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