We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
