I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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