Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize