what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
