I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
