I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, beer. Big fan.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize