9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
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