We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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