I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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