This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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