Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
