You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize