I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
no more duck duck goose at the bar
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
