Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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