Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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