Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
