I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
