Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
