I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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