were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
