The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
