where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
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