Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
