At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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