TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
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