Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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