So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
