Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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