If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Terrible idea I love it
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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