i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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