i may or may not be watching the land before time
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize