i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
