yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
