a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
