To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
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making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
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pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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