Your tits are I can't wait for
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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