i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
