The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
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as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
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Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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