you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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