it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
