Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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