I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
