You can't motorboat a personality
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Is Oprah even human
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
