There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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