You really coming over, don't trick.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
